Thoughts & the way it is

I’ve gotten much better at not having to hook on to whatever happens to be crossing my mind lately.  Looking back, I see how easy and natural it is to grab a thought with a death grip, and follow it all the way until the end.  It’s so easy that other thoughts are quickly grabbed as well feeling like the fall of dominos.  In short order, the mind is all abuzz with the thousands of thoughts, bouncing back and forth, demanding immediate attention and resolution.  You, me, the witnesses of all this chaos, thinking that there’s something that needs to be done with each of these spoiled brats, quickly become overwhelmed.  The heart races, the breath shortens, and tension develops in the base of the neck.  It all comes to a head at last and you find yourself standing in the shower, attempting to wash it all away with water as hot as you can physically stand it, on the verge of tears, wishing it all would go away – that you could start over.  Please, just let it start over again.

Fortunately, my mind doesn’t take me there.  I’m almost aloof anymore, but not ambivolent.  I love my life, my wife, and my family.  I now know the exact date that I’ll be laid off, and I’m still not worried about it.  It’s obvious to me that this is the way it should be.  Really, it would be painfully idiotic of me to think otherwise.  As they say, “It is what it is.”  Funny, ’cause it’s always that way.  If, even for a brief moment, you can relax into that knowledge, that things are exactly as they should be, you will find that there’s nothing at all to be worried about.  There’s nothing even to fear.  When you don’t believe that things are precisely as they should be, ask yourself, “How else could they be?”  If you’re honest, the answer will always be that it can’t be any way other than the way it is.  Relax, it’s all going according to plan.

Check out Byron Katie (www.thework.com) … she’s great for this stuff.